Last night, as I attempted in vain to find a comfortable position, I had a moment where I wished my husband could take over the rest of this pregnancy. When I mentioned that to him, he immediately said he'd be happy to. I get the sense that if this were actually possible, and I were able to hand him the baby to carry for the next five weeks, it would probably result in him being pregnant for about a week before gliding into easy labor and delivering Ferris without breaking a sweat.
When I think about the things my husband (or any man, for that matter) will never understand about being pregnant, I feel it necessary to share them with him:
The ability to put your pants on like a normal person will completely escape you.
Peeing constantly gets old, fast.
Carrying around an extra 30 lbs. is harder than you'd expect.
When you can't get comfortable, climbing out of your body seems like the only available option.
Hormones. That is all.
Feeling pretty when you are bloated, nauseous, exhausted and hot is amazingly difficult.
There will come a time when you think you can't possibly drink another glass of water. Drink one anyway.
The fear that you'll do something wrong and hurt the baby is crippling.
If you love to be the center of attention, you'll love being pregnant. If not, you'll often be overwhelmed and anxious.
At the end of a long day, when all you want to do is enjoy a few drinks, you can't.
Now, I know that list doesn't make pregnancy sound appealing at all - but it's not all bad. There are also the wonderful moments a man will never experience:
Being able to talk to your baby and feel it kick in response is better than watching your team play in the Super Bowl.
Having a free pass to indulge in your cravings without being judged is liberating.
The knowledge that you are carrying the child you've created with the person of your dreams is incomparable.
You'll never love someone you've never met the way you'll love this person.
On second thought, I take it back - I don't want to give up these last five weeks.
So here we are, with just a little over 5 weeks to go. I'm not entirely sure how this is possible, and I can't decide if I'm ready or if I want to stay pregnant forever - both emotions grip me at any given moment. One of the most common questions I get now is "Are you ready?" - and my answer is always the same: "Physically, yes - but beyond that, I'm not sure."
Ferris is wildly active at this point - and I like to think that the triggers are indicative of what our little squirt's personality will be. I went to a Patsy Cline tribute at the Ryman Auditorium on Friday night, and every time the music ramped up, so did Ferris - leading me to believe that our baby will have great taste in music. Yesterday we went out on the boat for a while, and as Ferris rolled around and kicked, I sighed with relief at the thought that we'll have a little one who loves the water.
Mother's Day in our family is usually celebrated the same way every year - my grandmother comes into town from Mississippi and joins my mom, my sister and I for the weekend. This year we were lucky enough to add my mother-in-law to the mix and it was so inspiring to look around the table at all of these women who have helped shape me and mold me into who I am. I give each of them credit for showing me different things: an insane sense of humor, the ability to multi-task, the tendency to be laid back at all times, fierce determination, stoic patience, and unconditional love - just to name a few. I feel lucky to be a part of this family of strong women, and I know they'll be here for us as we build our family...learning as we go and leaning on them for advice and support.
Today's ultrasound provided mixed results - a very healthy Ferris, although a very healthy Ferris that is still a bit too small. Growth is in the 24th percentile, which is lower than last time - although Ferris did gain a little bit of weight, it's just not the "normal" amount. We will go back in two more weeks for another ultrasound to monitor growth - but in the meantime we can rest assured that all is well.
(I have to admit that I'm enjoying the upside of these multiple ultrasounds - any chance to see this tiny little face again!)